The Color of Money
As anyone who has ever walked by the paint section in one of the big hardware stores knows, there are literally hundreds of paint colors from which to choose. Some are almost imperceptibly different, in that I have to squint or hold the chips at funny angles until I can safely proclaim "Yes I agree, my Dear, this one has a little too much purple in it."
What gets me about the multitude of colors are the names, few of which actually provide the shopper with a convenient color touchstone to compare. "Peas in a Pod," "Florida Mango," are just a couple examples of ones that help lead you in a direction. (I took these from the applet at the Behr website.)
Then there is "Autumn Mist." Want to guess what color that is? According to Behr, it is a slightly more muted shade of "Florida Mango." Or what about "Monaco"? Its a light blue.
I guess the paint manufacturers decided that rather than informative names, they should create evocative names that register with the emotions. For instance, the master bedroom in our previous house was covered in "Hidden Honey," which I think I would have more appropriately called "Dried Mustard Crust." But that doesn't create the same emotive response, does it?
I also think this bizarre naming scheme has a lot more to do with the women in households being the primary decision-maker when it comes to color.
That is why I am going to get rich by patenting a dual-naming paint color system. Every color is assigned two names, the original female/affective/uninformative can remain on the front, while a second name is printed in small letters on the back of the chip. This is the place the rest of us can sneak a peek at and say "Ah ha... I knew I recognized this particular hue!"
"Pecan Sandy" on the front reads "Bud Light Binge Shits" on the back.
"Vibrant Wildflower" on the front reads "Too Many Vitamins Pee" on the back.
"Vintage Lava" on the front reads "That Time of the Month" on the back.
"Fresh Heather" on the front reads "This is Going in My Son's Room Over My Dead Body" on the back.
Anyway, you get the picture. Or for a less offensive version, how about make reference to real world examples on the back of the chip. "This is the same color blue as the Cleveland Indians' uniforms" or "This is the color green used for computer code in The Matrix."